My life - from the impact of great loss, to a refreshing new take on life and a place where I now share ............... my favorite Plant Strong recipes....

Tuesday, November 2, 2010


Continuing with my theme of titling my posts with the first letter of the day of the week, I almost titled today's post, "Teary Tuesday".  It's early, but already I can tell it's going to be one of those days (insert big sigh here).

For most, today is simply Election Day - and this is my cue to remind you to get out there and vote.  I love how my friend Dave says it, "If you don't exercise your right to vote, you don't have a right to complain!".  If only you all could know Dave....

So today would be Chelsea Rae's 17th Birthday.  I watch her friends, and wonder what kind of things my baby would be doing.  What would her interests be?  There's a few given.  We probably would be going to the DMV today to test for her driver's license.  School would be causing grief and late nights working on projects.  There would be lots of giggles, texting and phone conversations - and yet at the same time there would be a maturity as she transformed into a young women.  Talk of college and dreams....  and Kate would want you all to know that she was the bestest big sister ever.

Where has the time gone? You should be here with me. I should be teasing you that I’m not going to let you get your drivers license until you’re 30.

New hairstyles, new music, new clothes…


Groans regarding homework and chores.

Drama over the little things.
Prayer over the big things.

Oh how I miss those times.

Today would be your day. Who knows how you would have wanted to celebrate?

I wonder about the little things… what would your favorite color be now. What kind of hair style would you chose. Would you have a rebellious streak, or would you be easy going as you go through these teen years – almost an adult...

Would you still have a heart for worship, or would you be so busy being busy?

I smile as I realize that your heart for worship now far exceeds anything we can grasp here on earth.


My heart aches as I miss my babe. No, this isn’t the way I planned for things to be at this time in my life.
Yet those who have been through trials and hardships – who haven’t given up – those are ones who truly know joy.

I have joy – in the midst of the trials. I have peace, even though I miss my baby. I have faith in God who loves me so much, and supernaturally carries me through. You may argue that He doesn’t care, or maybe even doesn’t exist. But that would be like trying to tell me that my best friend doesn’t exist. His presence has proven itself over and over in my life, so really, it doesn’t matter what others say or think.

I have hope in tomorrow. I have excitement, in the things that God is going to do in my life… and even more so, in the lives of others.

I have eternity.... with my baby.

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.  I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.  And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying,
  • '"Now the dwelling of God is with men, and He will live with them.  They will be His people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God.  He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.'
He who was seated on the throne said, "I am making everything new!"  Then He said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true."                    ~ Revelation 21:1-5


Lori said...

Oh my friend, I'm so sorry for your pain. I'm sending you hugs and prayers! Birthdays are sure tough - but I just picture how much better the birthday parties in heaven must be. Angels singing in a gillion part harmony!

Anonymous said...

Such an awesome testimony of your faith. My heart breaks for you but I still have joy knowing that God will use your pain for his kingdom and reward you and your family for trusting him with so much grief. Your daughter is happy now. She was so beautiful then but now she radiates as she is in the face of Christ whose love never left her despite her cancer. God bless you, dear friend. Your encouragement will help so many hurting people!!